Wednesday, June 18, 2008


Spent the morning with Gannet, laughing at our old word games, smiling at old phrases as if we still spoke them daily. At some point though he became sullen. He pointed in his icon book to the sad face and images that are labeled BE TOGETHER GOOD, GO AWAY BAD, SAD. He hit me on the shoulder, not hard, but with enough force to act as an adjective to the simple images and phrases from his book. I told him I love him, that I will always come back to see him, and listed every other friend who still visits him. The long list brought a wide smile to his face. He pointed to the Icon LOVE and I point to the same. He spits out his broad, frothy laughter.

If I truly do wish to treat and love Gannet as a human and a brother, I have to allow him the same complicated love and pain as every other person, even be part of that those feelings.. If I knew that he understood enough outside the sphere of his own life to comprehend why I’m no longer consistently in his life that would give me peace of mind. Maybe he does, and like the rest of us, just doesn’t like it. Maybe he can’t grasp far beyond the daily circumstances of his life. I don’t know, and GO AWAY BAD, BE TOGETHER GOOD just doesn’t say enough for either of us.